*jokes about making out with you until it actually happens*
The ultimate dad joke compilation
“And so the little lamb and his mama live happily ever after,” the girl finished reading her story aloud to the creature beside her. Hopeful orbs of blue glistened as she cocked her head up at him. “Didya like that, Mister Boogey?”
No response from underneath the black coat. She frowned, teetering off her seat ever so slowly before her tiny feet reached the ground.
“Mister Boogey?” she asked again, gripping the corners of the dark trench coat. When nothing responded, she slowly peeled it open, revealing the coat rack on which he had been perched. Where had he gone?
The little girl shrunk back, upset that her friend had left without a word. She curled up in her chair, clutching the book tightly in case he came back to hear the rest of the tale. Suddenly, a soft wind blew through the empty room, but before she could turn to see what had caused it, she was swept up in darkness.
“Gotcha,” the creature chuckled, cradling her close to him.
The child squeal with laughter most contagious, pleased of his return.
“I thought you left!” She gave a pout, looking up at his shadowy face.
“Why, my dear, I’d never leave you. I am your guardian after all, am I not?” The monster gave her a toothy smile. “And I will always be your Boogeyman.”
Tumblr: the only site that can turn something so terrifying into something utterly adorable
I know Lord of the Flies is supposed to be a very meaningful and symbolic book, but can we just talk about the fact that at the beginning of the book, Jack gives the fact that he can sing a C# as a legitimate reason for why he should be chief
MY CLASS NEVER GOT OVER THIS AND FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR WHENEVER SOMEONE DIDN’T WANT TO DO SOMETHING THEY SAID “but i can sing C# i shouldnt have to do it” AND IT STILL IS FUNNY TO ME
the end OMG
Do you believe me when I tell you how important it is not to give up?
Do you believe me when I tell you I am living a different life?
Oh my goddddd INCREDIBLE HUMAN BEING
Aiya Van Kooten everyone
When Aiya Van Kooten stood face-to-face with a burglar in her bedroom, her left eye twitched, then she went into “predator mode”.
“I screamed at him… jumped off my chair, leaped over my bed and sprinted after him down the stairs,” she said.
This is the best story of my life
“Although she was the only one home, Van Kooten said she had no regard for her safety - instead, she said she was just overwhelmed with “rage“….. ummmmm Hero!!!
Haha, badass Muslim woman. Love it!!!
This lady is so awesome. She lives with her grandma and was studying and had a towel on her head and no shoes but she chased them out of her garden, kicked one up the arse as he climbed a fence, they dropped a camera and laptop, she flagged down a passing driver to help her continue the pursuit, and it turned out he was ex-military, and they finally caught one of them in a park and pinned him as the police arrived. Now she’s going to visit the burglar in prison for the next few months to help with his rehabilitation.
So in summary:
This lady doesn’t just defend her home and loved ones, she will hunt you down, team up with other skilled individuals, get you put away, and then teach you the consequences of your actions until you’re a valuable member of society once more.
Seriously she’s a frigging superhero.